尋親重聚
跨越隔閡 為愛重聚-淺談被收養孩童尋親重聚
「我是誰? 台灣在哪裡? 我的生母、生父長什麼樣子？為什麼出養我? 原生家庭過得如何? 照顧過我的人會想起我嗎? …」被收養的孩子們長大之後，每每會在心中獨自猜想著這些關於原生家庭、出養原因的疑問。
忠義基金會收出養服務中心自民國94年開辦服務以來，已經為近千位失依孩童重新尋得永遠的「家」。然而，隨著孩子們年齡的成長，尤其是到了孩子們進入12-18歲的青春期之際，因著個體發展而有建立與追尋自我的心理需求，收養家庭依據有限資料所提供的身世資訊，逐漸無法滿足孩子們對身世的好奇。另外，國內/國外對收出養的觀念逐漸開放與成熟，身世告知不再像從前那般，是個令人難以啟齒、避諱而不談的話題，反而，收養家庭為了陪伴被收養的孩子成長，使其能逐步學習認識、接納自身的生命故事，主動得為孩子做準備，並且展開尋親之路。
根據忠義收出養服務中心的服務統計顯示，中心接獲國際收養父母、被收養童提出尋親協助的請求逐年增加，反映出被收養的孩子們了解身世的需求，以及尋親的渴望。
收出養服務中心在收養父母的支持之下，陪伴年滿12歲的被收養童進行尋親、與從前的照顧者重聚的旅程。每一個被收養童都擁有自己獨有的出養原因、安置歷程，以及收養後的成長環境，種種的變因影響尋親的孩子們是否能夠成功跨越時間、時區、國界、語言、文化的隔閡，尋得自己的生父、生母、其他重要他人。即使找到了重要他人，上述複雜、影響深遠的收出養議題，使得尋親過程時而讓人驚喜萬分、熱淚盈眶，時而卻也讓人心中百轉千迴。舉例來說，一般大眾可能難以想像，一個因為原生家庭失去保障、照顧孩童功能，而自幼被收養的孩子，長大後對生母的記憶微薄，如何應對再次與生母會面、分享彼此生活，甚至共同談論起當年出養的無奈，以及分離的失落。為滿足被收養孩子們的需求，忠義收出養服務中心持續透過多元的專業資源，站在維護孩童最佳利益的角度上，陪伴收出養三方重新開啟對話，並在必要時協尋、介入、提出建議、連結資源，並由專業人員陪同各方重聚會面，藉以支持聯繫過程能夠正向發展，並且安全無虞。
既然尋親重聚對收出養各方的關係人而言，議題複雜且充滿挑戰，為何要安排彼此重聚呢?
琳琳(匿名)七歲時，因為生母逝世、生父失蹤，案家無其他資源扶養，而接受出養安排。收養家庭竭力給予琳琳照顧與關愛，但是被收養童的身分，使得琳琳常常對自己是否被愛、受到保護感到困惑，甚至在進入青春期時出現情緒議題與行為。收養家庭待琳琳15歲積極探索身世的此時，請求忠義收出養服務中心，協助安排琳琳與原生家庭的重聚。再次回到原生家庭時，琳琳興奮不已得對收養父母介紹原生家庭的成員:「Look! We have the same eyes.」(看！我們有同樣的眼睛)、「He’s my cousin. My uncle’s son.」(他是我的表親，是我舅舅的兒子)、「 I remember here!」(我記得這裡!)。這一天，原生家庭的成員都儘可能前來與琳琳及收養家庭會面，他們彼此相擁而泣。琳琳的收養家庭並不擔心琳琳將因此想回到原生家庭，反而為琳琳感到高興，他們說：「我們相信，琳琳長大了，能認識愛她的家人，這對她而言至關重要。」
回到美國之後，當地的社工在後續追蹤報告中評估：「過去幾年，琳琳浮現一些對其家人的回憶。在相關的預備後，收養父母與琳琳和其原生家庭相處了幾天，所有事對琳琳而言都是正向經驗，能夠見到原生家庭讓她感到安慰。琳琳以正面的態度談論此次旅行，知道自己有廣大的延伸家庭，給予她情緒上的力量和安全感。」收養父母也與忠義收出養服務中心分享，琳琳在尋親重聚之後，表示自己與父母因為彼此的坦誠與支持而更親密，她感謝這樣的連結，也感謝重新和原生家庭連結。」
尋親重聚是收出養服務中的後端工作，我們陪伴被收養的孩子們尋親，與從前的照顧者重聚。我們看見孩子們如何在生命的逆境之中，習得保有希望、相信與感恩的心，也看見收養家庭、原生家庭各自為孩子們跨越種種挑戰的勇氣。重聚，讓我們再次共同見證了愛的可能性。
尋親後追信箱：postadoption.services@cybaby.org.tw
相關網站連結：
收出養資訊中心https://adoptinfo.sfaa.gov.tw/english/index
收出養資訊中心隸屬衛福部社家署(The Child and Juvenile Adoption Information Center is hosted by: Social and Family Affairs Administration, Ministry of Health and Welfare
Roots Searching
Breaking through barriers for a love-filled reunion - A brief discussion on adopted children seeking to reconnect with their birth families.
"Who am I? Where is Taiwan? What do my birth mother and father look like? Why was I put up for adoption? How has my biological family been living? Do the people who took care of me remember me?" As adopted children grow up, these questions about their birth family and the reasons for adoption often linger in their minds.
Since the Chung Yi Foundation launched adoption services in 2005, we have successfully found new "homes" for over a thousand children who have lost their families. However, as these children enter the challenging period of adolescence, typically between 12 and 18 years old, they start to experience a psychological need for self-discovery and identity. The information provided by adoptive families, based on limited data, gradually becomes insufficient to satisfy the curiosity these teenagers have about their origins.
Moreover, societal attitudes towards adoption, both domestically and internationally, have become more open and mature. The disclosure of one's adoption is no longer a taboo topic; instead, adoptive families proactively prepare their children to explore and understand their life stories, encouraging them to take the initiative in the quest to reconnect with their roots.
According to the data statistics from Chung Yi’s adoption services, our workers have received increasing roots searching requests from international adoptive parents and adopted children. This reflects the desire and need for adopted children to understand their origins and to connect with their roots. With the support of the adoptive parents, Chung Yi’s adoption services can help adopted children who are at least 12 years of age search for their roots and embark on a journey that reunites them with previous caretakers. Every adopted child has their own unique history of being put up for adoption, spending time at placement facilities, and growing up in a new environment post adoption. Each factor affects whether the roots searching child can successfully navigate the gap of time, nationality, country, language, and culture barriers, and find their birth parents or others that are important to them. Even when that someone important is found, the complicated and profound topic of adoption can sometimes lead the roots searching journey to be heartwarming and joyful, or an exercise in rumination and deep contemplation. For example, it may be difficult for the general public to imagine how a child who was given up for adoption at an early age due to the original family being unable to provide adequate care for the child, and who has the faintest memories of their birth parents when they grow up, would cope with meeting their biological parents again, sharing their life stories, and even reminisce about the impossible decision to give up for adoption and the loss of separation. In order to serve the needs of adopted children, Chung Yi’s adoption service center continues to employ multi-faceted professional resources and from the perspective of safeguarding the best interests of the children to accompany the three parties of the adoption process to reopen dialogues, and when necessary, assist in the search process, provide helpful suggestions, provide intervention, connect resources, and have professionals accompany all parties, and through our support help conduct a safe and positive reunion process.
If roots searching and meeting is such a complicated and challenging topic for all involved in the adoption process, why would we try to arrange a reunion?
When Linlin (anonymous) was seven years old, her biological mother passed away and her biological father disappeared. The family had no other resources to support her, so they accepted an adoption arrangement. The adoptive family tried its best to provide care and love to Linlin, but as an adopted child, Linlin was often confused about whether she was loved and protected, and even developed emotional issues and behaviors when she entered adolescence. When Linlin was 15 years old and actively researching about her past, the adoptive family asked the Chung Yi Adoption Service Center to help arrange the reunion of Linlin and her original family. When she met her birth family again, Linlin was so excited that she introduced the members of her original family to her adoptive parents: 「 看！我們有同樣的眼睛」(“Look! We have the same eyes.”)，「他是我的表親，是我舅舅的兒子」（”He’s my cousin. My uncle’s son.”）、「我記得這裡! 」(“I remember here!”)
On this day, members of the original family came to meet Linlin and the adoptive family as much as possible. They hugged each other and cried. Linlin's adoptive family was not worried that Linlin would want to return to her original family because of this. Instead, they were happy for Linlin. They said, "We believe that when Linlin grows up, she will be able to know her family who loves her. This is very important to her."
After returning to the United States, the local social worker evaluated in a follow-up report: "In the past few years, memories of Linlin’s original family resurfaced. After relevant preparations, the adoptive parents spent a few days with Linlin and her original family. Everything was a positive experience for Linlin. Being able to meet her original family made her feel comforted. Linlin talked about this trip in a positive manner, knowing that she had a large extended family, which gave her emotional strength and security. "Adoptive parents also shared with Chung Yi Adoption Service Center that after the family reunion, Linlin said that she and her parents became closer because of each other's honesty and support. She was grateful for this connection and was grateful to be reconnected with her original family. . "
Roots searching is the follow up work of adoption services. We accompany adopted children to find their families and reunite with their former caregivers. We see how children learn to maintain hope, faith and gratitude in the face of adversity in life, and we also see the courage of adoptive families and birth families to overcome various challenges for their children. Reunited, let us once again witness the possibility of love together.
Post adoption email：postadoption.services@cybaby.org.tw
